Robin Hood:

A Brief History

Boldly bearing his bow,

Arrows in his quiver,

Robin turned the taker

Into a glum giver.

Robin Hood, as we all know, lost his horse in Shergar Forest after going on a mead bender.  Desperate for a wee, he stumbled between miles of trees, and sometimes against them, before finally coming across a tiny Portaloo.  A big, burly fellow was just coming out, adjusting his hose.

"I name thee Little John", slurred Robin, shouldering a path to the pungent bowl, and the soothing sound of a waterfall soon filled the forest.  After wiping his hands on his tunic, Robin met Little John's friends: Will Scarlet (who was on the run after killing Dr Black with a candlestick in the billiard room) and Friar Tuck, a rotund, jolly monk who would give anything a go and who had a penchant for Spoonerisms.  They had lots of adventures while looking for Robin's horse, accusing Bad King John of money laundering when the crown jewels were lost in the Wash, and Robin was in like Flynn with Barmaid Marion after playing a blinding game of darts down the Red Lion.